- What ‘vibes’ are others giving off that you can feel.
- What’ vibes’ are you giving off that others can feel.
Energy is all around us. In fact, that is all there is! We are all energy. Your sixth sense is that ‘energy’ vibe. Just like your ‘gut’ instinct.
In the world of quantum physics, we learn that nothing in this world is solid. Multiple Nobel Prize winners have proved that the physical work is simply energy. They showed that thoughts are things. Thoughts are responsible for holding energy fields together.
At our core, we are energy. Our bodies are made up of:
= Tissues and organs ↓
= Cells ↓
= Molecules ↓
= Atoms ↓
= Sub-atomic particles ↓
= Energy!
We are all energy. This is why we need to be so careful about what ‘energy’ we are carrying and emitting!
Trusting ‘vibes’ and using your ‘sixth sense’ or your ‘gut’ have all been hailed with saving the day for countless success stories. However, where are the stories where the vibes were wrong?
– Are those “vibes” we feel really the truth of what is going on?
– Can two people from different backgrounds be in the same situation and experience different “vibes”?
– How much of the “vibe” is objective, and how much is subjective?
We all want to be seen as trusted individuals. When I think about my role in my community, I would hope to be seen as a person who can provide guidance, support, remove roadblocks, and help ensure success. For this reason, I believe leaving the results of my work to ‘vibes’ that you or your team may or may not feel may be playing with fire! I think we must be intentional with our behaviors to build high-trust environments in the workplace.
Trust is not just a soft, helpful-to-have virtue. It is a strong economic driver and the glue that holds personal relationships together. Trust is more relevant now than ever before! Some may even say it is the new currency of the world!
When I think of success in any capacity, I think of authenticity, and I think of feelings of security. I think of feeling trust.
If you approach the work you do with a sense of kindness and appreciation for not only the situation but the people that you are fortunate enough to experience the job with, it is critically important to secure that success with trust.
One of the courses that I teach is Leading at the Speed of Trust by Franklin Covey. This course is all about personal effectiveness and how, as a leader, it is critically important for you to understand that your leadership capacity is about influence, and its core is trust.
Stephen Covey said, “Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.”
I sometimes think when we’re looking at the success of a project or an organization, we forget very quickly that the work is not getting done by systems, processes, policies, and procedures.
The work is done with and through people.
The speed at which you can establish a connection with employees, with your family, with clients and customers, is the essential critical component of any successful leader or organization.
Building trust means building confidence not only in the team but in one another. If there’s no trust, this leads to suspicions that lead to ultimate team failure. In a high trust relationship, you can say the wrong thing to someone and they will still get what you mean. Have you ever heard somebody being judged on their intentions versus their actions? That is a high-trust relationship. In low-trust relationships, everything you say leaves the room for interpretation in the ears and the mind of the receiver, and if there’s any room for error, it is acted upon.
Like most of Stephen Covey’s teachings, he always recommends that the first place you need to start when you are examining your trust is the foundation – YOU! How do you trust yourself? If you can’t trust yourself, you will have a hard time believing others. Your personal relationship with yourself is often the source of your suspicions of others. This is why I must keep commitments to myself. If I say that I’m going to do something, I must keep that appointment. Otherwise, I’m training my brain and my body not to trust me. I said I was going to do something and I didn’t do it.
Training in Emotional Intelligence will also help you be able to act intentionally and let you be aware of your own interactions and how they can be improved. In fact, EQ (Emotional Quotient) is now seen as being more critical to success in any organization than IQ (Intelligence Quotient). When you use a high level of emotional intelligence, you can begin to improve your day-to-day communications in the workplace. This type of thinking helps you to leverage each daily interaction as an opportunity to build trust and confidence in your leadership skills.
Maya Angelou helps bring the point home with her famous quote, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”
So, if you are thinking about building trust in a team, it is more about the individual contributors that the group as a whole. With a focus on integrity and intent, regardless of the role, I believe that leaders at all levels can take valuable learnings from this straightforward advice.
Here are the 13 behaviors for high trust in any relationship.
Behavior #1 Talk Straight: Be honest and tell the truth. Let people know where you stand. Use simple language. Call things what they are. Demonstrate integrity. Don’t manipulate people or distort facts. Don’t spin the truth. Don’t leave false impressions.
Behavior #2 Demonstrate Respect: Genuinely care for others. Show you care. Respect the dignity of every person and every role. Treat everyone with respect, especially those who can’t do anything for you. Show kindness and little things. Don’t fake caring.
Behavior #3 Create Transparency: Tell the truth in a way people can verify. Declare your intent. Get real and be genuine. Be open and authentic. Err on the side of disclosure. Be transparent about not being able to be transparent (e.g., when the law or ethics preclude it). Operate on the premise of “What you see is what you get.” Don’t have hidden agendas. Don’t hide critical information.
Behavior #4 Right Wrongs: Make things right when you are wrong. Apologize quickly. Make restitution where possible. Demonstrate humility. Don’t cover things up. Don’t let pride get in the way of doing the right thing.
Behavior #5 Show Loyalty: Give credit to others. Speak about people as if they were present. Represent others who are there to speak for themselves. Don’t badmouth others behind their backs. When you must talk about others, check your intent. Don’t disclose others’ private information.
Behavior #6 Deliver Results: Establish a track record of results. Get the right things done. Make things happen. Accomplish what you’re hired to do. Be on time and within budget. Don’t overpromise and underdeliver. Don’t make excuses for not delivering.
Behavior #7 Get Better: Continuously improve. Increase your capabilities. Be a constant learner. Develop feedback systems, both formal and informal. Act on the feedback you receive. Thank people for feedback. Don’t consider yourself above feedback. Don’t assume today’s knowledge and skills will be sufficient for tomorrow’s challenges.
Behavior #8 Confront Reality: Take issues head-on, even the “undiscussable.” Address the rough stuff directly. Acknowledge the unsaid. Confront issues before they turn into major problems. Confront the reality, not the person. Lead-out courageously in conversation. Don’t skirt the real issues. Don’t bury your head in the sand.
Behavior #9 Clarify Expectations: Disclose and reveal expectations. Discuss them. Validate them. Renegotiate with them if needed and possible. Don’t violate expectations. Don’t assume that expectations are clear or shared.
Behavior #10 Practice Accountability: Hold yourself accountable first; hold others accountable second. Take responsibility for results, good or bad. Be clear on how you will communicate how you are doing and how others are doing. Don’t avoid or shirk responsibility. Don’t blame others or point fingers when things go wrong.
Behavior #11 Listen First: Listen before you speak. Understand. Listen with your ears, your eyes, and your heart. Find out what the most important behaviors are to the people you are working with. Don’t assume you know what matters most to others. Don’t presume you have all the answers to all the questions.
Behavior #12 Keep Commitments: Say what you were going to do, and then do it. Make commitments – both explicit and implicit – very carefully and keep them at almost all costs. Communicate when you can’t. Make keeping promises the symbol of your honor. Don’t break confidences. Don’t attempt to “spin” your way out of a promise you’ve broken.
Behavior #13 Extend Trust: Demonstrate a propensity to trust. Extend trust abundantly to those who have earned your trust. Extend trust conditionally to those who are earning your trust. Learn how to appropriately Extend trust to others based on the situation, risk, and credibility of the people involved. But start with a propensity to trust. Don’t withhold trust because there is risk involved.
Which behavior was your most important takeaway?
//cross-posted at www.powerupwork.org